Manners? for the 21st century. |

Most of us will know who Emily Post and Amy Vanderbilt are, or at least be familiar with their many books about etiquette. (Emily Post died in 1960, but the books continue to be written by Elizabeth and Peggy Post.) When we were
young, we were taught to say Please and Thank You, and other
basics of politeness. We were expected to be on our "best behaviour" when out in public, and generally polite at home.

A few years ago, Miss Manners started
writing books, with her take on some of the social situations that face people
in the modern world – ones that Emily Post might never have imagined.

And there are plenty of books available addressing specific situations
such as weddings, how to interact with
people of other cultures and in business settings.

But many people will have also noticed a decline in social graces, and
have written about this as well. Lynne
Truss wrote a bestseller in 2005, with “Talk to the hand: the utter bloody
rudeness of the world today, or six good reasons to stay home and bolt the
door.”   Lucinda Holdforth added to the
debate in 2007, with “Why manners matter: the case for civilized behavior in a
barbarous world.”   Others have chimed
in, with “The Civility solution: what to do when people are rude,” by P. M.
Forni, and let us know that this sort of thing can cost us money, with “The
Cost of bad behavior: how incivility is damaging your business and what to do
about it”.

Some of the titles are more humourous, such
as “I see rude people: one woman’s battle to beat some manners into impolite
society” and “Classy: be a lady, not a tramp”.

We think that this is a 21^st century decline, but there
was a book in 1998 called “Can I fax you a thank-you note?”

But have things really gone too far, because of the ease of social
media? In 2010, Ilana Gershon wrote “The
Breakup 2.0 : disconnecting over social media.”
It seems that while breaking up used to be hard to do – it's much easier now - you just send a
tweet or post it on Facebook.