Word Out Contest: Best Bad Advice
Best
Bad advice contest – Win an iPad mini!
Ever had a situation you didn’t know how to deal with? If
so, you may have chosen to write into an advice column to get an expert opinion
on how to solve your particular dilemma.
In this contest, we’re switching things up a bit, and asking
YOU to provide a solution to a problem. So put on your “Dear Abby” thinking
caps, and set us straight on how to solve our particular issue.
Help!
Three
weeks ago, I borrowed a big pile of comic books from my local library (I love
to read). A few days ago, my friend came over and we were reading a bunch of
them together in my back yard. Today the comic books are due, and I can’t find
a bunch of the comics! Is it possible that my friend may have taken some home
with him? If I don’t get the books back by the end of the day, I’m going to
have a huge library fine!
What
should I do?
There aren’t a lot of rules, in fact, we only specify that:
- You have to be a resident of Toronto to qualify
as a winner. - You provide us with a valid email address when
you submit your entry (don’t worry; it’ll be kept confidential – see below for
more details). - You have to submit your entry by 11:59 PM on Sunday
July 14 2013 in order to qualify to win the prize!
The author of the most innovative piece of advice (be it
wise or hilarious) we get will win their
very own iPad mini! Pretty sweet, huh? So get thinking, and provide us with
a piece of advice in the comment box below!
Personal information
on this form is collected under the authority of the Public Libraries Act, s.20
(a) and (d) and will be used to administer the Library's Word Out contest.
Questions about the collection or management of personal information should be
directed to Thomas
Krzyzanowski Service Specialist – Web, 789 Yonge Street, 416-393-7519.
55 thoughts on “Word Out Contest: Best Bad Advice”
Hey There!
Before talking to your friend, check and make sure you’re missing a comic, if you’ve checked contact your friend, tone is very important, don’t accuse your friend of stealing, ask him if he misplaced the comic after using it or accidently took it with him, let him know that you’re scared of getting fined, ask your friend to help you find it.Before talking to your friend, check and make sure you’re missing a comic, if you’ve checked contact your friend, tone is very important, don’t accuse your friend of stealing, ask him if he misplaced the comic after using it or accidently took it with him, let him know that you’re scared of getting fined, ask your friend to help you find it.
Sincerely Abby
Hey there,
That’s great that you and your friend are reading comic books and
visiting the library. But it is important to return your books on time.
First check and make sure again that you don’t have any of the missing books, you may of had misplaced them somewhere. However if you don’t find them, simply call your friend and ask him if he took them by any chance.
REMEMBR: While you’re asking your friend make sure you don’t accuse him. Just be like “Hey, the comic books that we read together are due today, but I can’t find some of the books. Did you byany chances take some books with you?”
If your friend says no, then don’t worry they’re probably
somewhere at your home. So ask your friend and family members to help look around your recent surroundings and places you were at. It’s not like the books had legs to run off so I’m sure the books are somewhere near you, so don’t worry! Good Luck finding those comic books, because I know you will 🙂
– Abby
Dear Comic Book borrower,
This dilemma looks like a detective case! First, you should confirm that you are missing a few comic books. Then you have to rule out that you haven’t misplaced the comic books. You can also begin by retracing your steps, from the very moment you borrowed the books. You can begin by checking around the places where you you usually keep your comic books, or where you keep books/library books in general, and look around all the places where you were reading the comic books. If you still haven’t found them, second, approach everyone in your household one by one. It is important to get your paren’ts or guardians involved, as they can provide advice and insight into the matter. Maybe they saw some comic books lying around, as a safety concern or thinking they might get damaged and placed them at a safe location. If you have ruled out all the above, third it may be a possibility that your friend may have taken a few comic books with him. Call him up/contact him causally bring up the matter, that you seem to be missing a few comic books, ask him whether he had taken any of comic books home with him, and also ask him where he had placed the comic books he had read that day. Also adding that those comic books were borrowed from the Library, and that you would be fined if you do not return them on time. Lastly, remember there are countless possibilities to consider, in determining the where about of your missing comic books. The important this is to get your paren’ts/guardians involved in the matter. As I stated above they can provide advice and insight into the dilemma. Hopefully after all that detective work, this case has been closed.
Um, excuse me? Okay, wait. Hello, kid-who-lost-his-comics, but did you ever think that maybe you’re only thinking of one way you could have lost your comics?
You may have never thought that maybe – just maybe – your dog ate it. Okay, maybe you don’t have a dog. Well then. Maybe an airplane came down and stole it. Okay, maybe no. Oh, I got it! The circus is in town. I swear the juggler looked like he liked “Archie” comics to me. I’m just saying…
Okay – here’s the deal. What you’re going to do is your going to go to the library. You are going to sneak in – don’t ask me how because I don’t know. I’m not a thief – I just write for Dear Abby. Just get in – shake the door a bit and it’ll open, trust me. Then you’re going to tape a book onto your face. Then you’re going to walk around like a mummy – just keep practicing until opening time. And then when the first librarian enters you’re going to scare her. Then she’ll believe there’s a ghost haunting the library, no one will enter for a really long time, and then it’ll buy you some time to find those books.
Or you could just call your friend and ask him if he has it.
Sincerely,
Abby
P.S. I’m new at this.
Hello Person Who Lost Comic Books,
Before you go and demand your books back from your “friend”, let’s think about something here. Look at this scenario. Your friend could have been visiting a different world. Now don’t laugh. We never know. And the world your friend goes to, probably doesn’t have a clue of what’s going on in our world. So your friend, being nice gives them comic books to help them understand our ways. Maybe they considered our world as a threat but because of the comic books you borrowed and your friend eventually stole, they change their mind about us. In comics, the good guys always win. They are possibly the other world’s inspiration to do better. But imagine if your friend didn’t take your comics. They would think that we are a threat and come with their laser guns (real ones), machine tanks and atom bombs. Now do you really want another apocalypse? I thought we went through this before. Just think of the damage that could have happened. So keep quiet, don’t say anything and pay up your $100 or how much ever those comics cost.
It is for the greater good.
Sincerely,
Abby
You want a library cop after you? (No, you don’t.) Get to a plastic surgeon, change your appearance and remove any identifying marks/scars. Sand off your fingerprints. Beg, borrow or steal a boat and head for a non-extradition country. Donate your time to local libraries and after school reading programs in the off chance you will get leniency some day. Hope for a moments peace as you spend the rest of your life looking over your shoulder knowing the library cop will find you one way or another. Write an eBook for free distribution to spread awareness about both, your mistake and about responsible borrowing practices.
RUN CHILD! RUN IF YOU WISH TO LIVE!!!!
The juplin (a one-eyed purple elf with eagle wings) is after you!!
These beasts are the most cleverest species of all time. When you were sleeping last night, a juplin was hidden in the secret passage way in your wall (DON’T ASK HOW I KNOW THIS!) The juplin used its eye to beam a telephoto (a yellowish beam of light that transports objects/living things) towards you. The beam missed you because you fortunately tossed to your side, and hit a pile of comic books that you had been reading.
My senses tell me that it has realized that it has not got you. The juplin will be beaming down to Earth from planet Berik any second now!
CHILD RUN TO THE NEAREST BATHROOM!! From here, spin around thirteen times while saying, “linra trunep.” DO IT RIGHT NOW OR DIE A MOST PAINFUL DEATH ON BERIK!
I will see you soon,
the sear and guardian of thee
P.S. I shall explain all when I see you.
Hey, now I see that you’re worried about a fine or getting into any trouble, but the library can’t charge you if it’s, say burned to the ground for instance. Here’s the best plan, guaranteed no fees for you!
Take the comics that you do have back to the library to return, and just as the librarian is about to tell you that there’s books missing, look him/her in the eye and start chanting “Wey oh wey oh diddly dumb oh ban oh ban oh bee” whilst skipping in a circle around the librarian. Repeat the chant until he/she is obviously caught off guard, then take your stack of books and toss them about the room. Since you’ve said this magical chant, these books are now spellbound, and will spontaneously explode in a shower of glitter and flames. If you’re lucky, the book-flames will catch fire on the walls and shelves, and the building will crumble to the ground around you. But on the off-chance your chanting was wrong or not loud enough, this may not be the effect that you’ll get. In this case, chant very loudly while jumping up and down: “fire fire on the page, combust and flame with anger and rage!”. This chant is very common amongst people suffering from anger disorders and magicians, and results in success 98.3% of the time.
Once the building’s crumbled around you and the librarian is likely too shocked to say or do anything but stand there frigidly, all you need to do is show off the most innocent smile you have, say “sorry sir/ma’am, that wasn’t supposed to happen”, grab any non-destroyed books you can and bolt!
Hope the helps 🙂
Dear comic-book-borrower,
How could you?
The only plausible thing you can do now is recreate every comic book your friend stole or whatever happened to them. I hope you remember what you read and have stupendous artists skills, if not, you’re out of luck.
Hope it all works out for you mate!
Dear Personwholovescomicbooks,
First of all, before you check in with your friend about the comic books, check your backyard. Remember: animals + a big pile of comics = funfunfun for them and horror for you. Who knows, maybe a birdie decided it would be useful in its nest and took it and flew up on a tall tree and used it? Perhaps a neighbour’s doggie decided it was like a bone and buried it?
Either ways, you probably won’t be able to return the comics to the library…I doubt they would appreciate the beautiful piece of art: comics with dirt and dog drool over it or strips of comics in a big confetti pile. Now, here is what you can do to AVOID THE FINE:
1. pick a really famous singer, call them, ask them to go to the library or dress up as them, catwalk into the library and let them sing the whole library senseless, and convince the librarians to remove
the fine.
2. Ask the boogie man to come in and distract everyone while you sneak in and remove the fine yourself. Even better, ask slender man to come and scare everyone out of the library while you stay
behind and remove the fine, lol!
3. If you are a sophisticated person and honest, accept the fine, and join some programs that Toronto Public library offers and pay back your fine by doing community service! A great way to stay honest,be responsible for your decisions, and help out your local library!
Hope this helps,
Abby
Dear Homo Sapien,
Ah yes the common “OMGIMISPLACEDMYSTUFFNOWIAMINDEEPTROUBLEWHATDOIDO?” situation. Under such dire circumstances you must think positive! The first thing I would do is create a transportation unicorn named “Princess” and use him (Yes it HAS to be a him) to travel to your friend’s room. (No this is not breaking and entering, this is merely using your resources) Search through every nook and cranny within and see if you can find anything even remotely related to those missing comic books. No luck? No problem! Grab the most precious item from your friend’s room and then give them a call saying “If I don’t get those comics back *insert item here* is going down with me to *insert faraway country name here*. You’re bound to get results!
Worse comes to worse you can always “ask” your friend to see if they have your comics or you can look in the backyard again.
Best of luck!
Abby
Dear Who It May Concern,
Before you start freaking out, and blaming your friend. You should start asking your paren’ts if they may have seen it. Do not be afraid to ask your paren’ts. Only after asking your paren’ts you should ask your friend if he or she may have accidentally took it in their bag or something. Another option would be checking places around the house that could have fallen out of your bag or dropped when you were taking it out into the backyard. Even before this you should try renewing all the comic books so you don’t start freaking out. because when you freak out some people tend to miss spots that could help you find the misplaced comic books.
-J.X.
Dear,
whoever lost their comic books.
Look all over the places you left them before, and You can always renew them. If not I am really sorry, hope you find them!
DEAR,UNRESPONSIBLEPERSONWHOLOSTCOMICBOOKS,
FIRST, HOW COULD YOU? YOU KNOW YOU CAN NEVER TRUST ANYONE IN THIS WORLD… EVEN YOURSELF! MAYBE YOU TOOK THEM, HID THEM SO YOUR FRIEND WOULD GET IN TROUBLE, AND YOUR FRIEND WOULD HAVE TO PAY, SO YOU COULD KEEP THE BOOKS FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER, SINCE, YOU LOVE COMIC BOOKS SO MUCH. THAT IS OBVIOUSLY NOT THE CASE HERE, SINCE WE KNOW THAT ONLY YOUR FRIEND WOULD DO SUCH A THING, AND NOT YOU!
YOU KNOW WHAT; I WILL HELP YOU HERE A BIT. DO NOT TELL ANYBODY BUT YOURSELF, YOU SHOULD DRESS UP LIKE THE POLICE, AND GO UP TO YOUR FRIENDS HOUSE. WHEN HE OPENS THE DOOR, SAY YOU HAVE A SEARCH WARRANT, THEN, SEARCH FOR YOUR BOOKS IN HIS HOUSE. LOOK IN EVERY CORNER, AND EVERY CENTIMETER OF YOUR FRIENDS HOUSE…WHO KNOWS, MAYBE HE IS A PROFESSIONAL THIEF (THAT, LETS JUST SAY, YOU NEVER KNEW ABOUT, BUT YOU SECRETLY DO). IF YOU STILL CANNOT FIND THE BOOKS, GO UP TO THE SUSPECT- WHICH IS YOUR FRIEND AND SCREAM “HANDS UP! I AM GOING TO HAVE TO ARREST YOU, FOR TAKING SOME VERY VALUABLE COMIC BOOKS FROM A VERY AWESOME PERSON’S PROPERTY, IT’S EITHER YOU GO TO JAIL AND HAVE A CRIMINAL RECORD, OR YOU TELL ME WHERE THE MISSING COMIC BOOKS ARE…NOW!” YOUR FRIEND IS OBVIOUSLY GOING TO TELL YOU, AND/OR GIVE YOU THE BOOKS. WHEN YOU GET THEM, TAKE OFF YOUR COSTUME (ONLY YOUR COSTUME PLEASE) AND REVEAL YOURSELF TO YOUR FRIEND. YOUR FRIEND WILL BE SHOCKED, AND THAT IS WHEN YOU WILL GO UP TO YOUR FRIEND AND SAY, “I KNEW IT WAS YOU ALL ALONG, I AM SMARTER THAN YOU THINK…IN YOUR FACE! ARE YOU JEALOUS?” THEN, JUST START POINTING AND LAUGHING. IF HE STILL DOES NOT HAVE IT. HERE IS PLAN Z: JUST SNEAK IN TO THE LIBRARY AFTER THE BOOKS ARE DUE, AND REMOVE THE FINES FROM YOUR NAME. WHEN YOU GET TO THE LIBRARY, ACT LIKE YOU DO NOT KNOW ENGLISH, AND WHEN THE LIBRARIAN ANNOUCES THAT THE LIBRARY WILL BE CLOSING, HIDE SOMEWHERE VERY SECRET. WHEN EVERYBODY HAS LEFT, GO ON THE COMPUTER AND REMOVE THE FINES FROM YOUR NAME, IN THE MORNING, AFTER, A FEW PEOPLE HAVE ARRIVED, LEAVE THE LIBRARY LIKE A BOSS.
THAT IS THE END OF YOUR BOOK PROBLEM! TOUCH THE WHOLE SCENARIO OFF WITH AN EVIL LAUGH…” MWA HAH AH HA HAH AH”. BE PROUD! YOU JUST DID WHAT AN EVIL MASTERMIND COULD NEVER DO… NOT THAT I AM CALLING YOU EVIL OR ANYTHING.
SINCERELY,
ABBY
P.S. WHATEVER YOU DO, DO NOT TELL YOUR FRIEND THAT THEY WERE YOUR MISSING LIBRARY BOOKS, YOU WILL JUST FOIL THE WHOLE PLAN, GENIUS (THAT WAS SARCASM).
*REAL ONE*
DEAR,UNRESPONSIBLEPERSONWHOLOSTCOMICBOOKS,
FIRST, HOW COULD YOU? YOU KNOW YOU CAN NEVER TRUST ANYONE IN THIS WORLD… EVEN YOURSELF! MAYBE YOU TOOK THEM, HID THEM SO YOUR FRIEND WOULD GET IN TROUBLE, AND YOUR FRIEND WOULD HAVE TO PAY, SO YOU COULD KEEP THE BOOKS FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER, SINCE, YOU LOVE COMIC BOOKS SO MUCH. THAT IS OBVIOUSLY NOT THE CASE HERE, SINCE WE KNOW THAT ONLY YOUR FRIEND WOULD DO SUCH A THING, AND NOT YOU!
YOU KNOW WHAT; I WILL HELP YOU HERE A BIT. DO NOT TELL ANYBODY BUT YOURSELF, YOU SHOULD DRESS UP LIKE THE POLICE, AND GO UP TO YOUR FRIENDS HOUSE. WHEN HE OPENS THE DOOR, SAY YOU HAVE A SEARCH WARRANT, THEN, SEARCH FOR YOUR BOOKS IN HIS HOUSE. LOOK IN EVERY CORNER, AND EVERY CENTIMETER OF YOUR FRIENDS HOUSE…WHO KNOWS, MAYBE HE IS A PROFESSIONAL THIEF (THAT, LETS JUST SAY, YOU NEVER KNEW ABOUT, BUT YOU SECRETLY DO). IF YOU STILL CANNOT FIND THE BOOKS, GO UP TO THE SUSPECT- WHICH IS YOUR FRIEND AND SCREAM “HANDS UP! I AM GOING TO HAVE TO ARREST YOU, FOR TAKING SOME VERY VALUABLE COMIC BOOKS FROM A VERY AWESOME PERSON’S PROPERTY, IT’S EITHER YOU GO TO JAIL AND HAVE A CRIMINAL RECORD, OR YOU TELL ME WHERE THE MISSING COMIC BOOKS ARE…NOW!” YOUR FRIEND IS OBVIOUSLY GOING TO TELL YOU, AND/OR GIVE YOU THE BOOKS. WHEN YOU GET THEM, TAKE OFF YOUR COSTUME (ONLY YOUR COSTUME PLEASE) AND REVEAL YOURSELF TO YOUR FRIEND. YOUR FRIEND WILL BE SHOCKED, AND THAT IS WHEN YOU WILL GO UP TO YOUR FRIEND AND SAY, “I KNEW IT WAS YOU ALL ALONG, I AM SMARTER THAN YOU THINK…IN YOUR FACE! ARE YOU JEALOUS?” THEN, JUST START POINTING AND LAUGHING. IF HE STILL DOES NOT HAVE IT. HERE IS PLAN Z: JUST SNEAK IN TO THE LIBRARY AFTER THE BOOKS ARE DUE, AND REMOVE THE FINES FROM YOUR NAME. WHEN YOU GET TO THE LIBRARY, ACT LIKE YOU DO NOT KNOW ENGLISH, AND WHEN THE LIBRARIAN ANNOUCES THAT THE LIBRARY WILL BE CLOSING, HIDE SOMEWHERE VERY SECRET. WHEN EVERYBODY HAS LEFT, GO ON THE COMPUTER AND REMOVE THE FINES FROM YOUR NAME, IN THE MORNING, AFTER, A FEW PEOPLE HAVE ARRIVED, LEAVE THE LIBRARY LIKE A BOSS.
THAT IS THE END OF YOUR BOOK PROBLEM! TOUCH THE WHOLE SCENARIO OFF WITH AN EVIL LAUGH…” MWA HAH AH HA HAH AH”. BE PROUD! YOU JUST DID WHAT AN EVIL MASTERMIND COULD NEVER DO… NOT THAT I AM CALLING YOU EVIL OR ANYTHING.
SINCERELY,
ABBY
P.S. WHATEVER YOU DO, DO NOT TELL YOUR FRIEND THAT THEY WERE YOUR MISSING LIBRARY BOOKS, YOU WILL JUST FOIL THE WHOLE PLAN, GENIUS (THAT WAS SARCASM). If the police catch you trying to be a fake cop, they might charge YOU. by following this advice you might land your self in some trouble, no….. A LOT OF TROUBLE, but hey, its worth it right? If anything bad happen I take no responsibility for it!
Dear human who may or may not have questionable taste in friends,
Okay so coming from a person who has gotten many a library fine, the first thing you can do is go online to the library’s website, sign in and then renew the comics you don’t have. You can even renew them twice! Trust me, this has came in handy for me when I take out too many books at once and can’t finish them in time. Second, you can ask your friend considering how you explained the situation hasn’t really shone a good light on him, make sure you keep your cool and ask him calmly and politely. There has been a lot of times that I myself have been caught eyeing someone else’s book with a ravenous look in my eye. Lastly try asking you paren’ts. They especially have a knack for finding things that you can’t. Remember, no matter how much you want to interrogate your friend like an episode of Criminal Minds, remember he/she is your friend, and if they did happen to “borrow” some comics, they didn’t mean you any harm (I hope).
I salute you fellow boo misplacer and hope all turns out well, and if it doesn’t you can at least buy yourself a couple of weeks after renewing them. ;D
-Abby
book* my bad. 😀
Dear Kid,
You are lucky to have written to me. If you hadn’t, you wouldn’t make it out of this alive. See, you’ve gotten yourself in a fine mess. I’ve been there before. In the summer of ‘69, I was in the same situation you are. Except it wasn’t comic books (those were lame), it was cooking DVDs. See, I thought I would get away with it, so I didn’t do anything. Then next thing I knew, the library police were chasing after me with loaded guns. They told me they weren’t going to let me live. I had to abandon my husband, my children. I left behind my entire life. They chased me out of the province. I moved to Toronto, made a new identity. The last thing I want is for anyone to experience the same fate. Over the years, I investigated. I know their secrets. I can help you. My instructions are explicit. I need you to follow every word I say.
First, do not make any contact with anyone. Don’t talk. No facial expressions. Do not even breathe loudly in the direction of another person. You don’t know who’s a spy. Dress casually, as you normally would but put on a wig (different colour of your regular hair) and a fake nose. Do not draw attention to yourself. Bring your library card. Walk to your library. Do not get there using a vehicle. That contributes to global warming. When you get to the library, pay a small boy $5 to pretend as if he’s having a seizure when you say a certain cue. Ask the person at the front desk if you could change the address on your card. After the person has loaded your file on the computer, yell at point at the little boy saying “HE’S HAVING A SEIZURE!” Quickly hop behind the desk, delete all your information and delete the books that you owe. They will have no record of you in their entire database. Just to make sure, smash the computer on the floor during the commotion. When people begin to turn heads in your direction, sneak over to the book return and shove yourself into the slot. Cover yourself in books and hide inside the bin until after dark. After the library has closed, quietly exit through a back door.
For the next few days, lie low. Burn the comic books that you have and if you find more, burn them too. If your friend turns up with them, tell him you have no idea whose they are and no recollection of reading them with him. If your friend becomes suspicious and starts prying into your life, it is best to put him in a box and ship him to a foreign country, for safety measures. After several months, return to the library and make a new card under an alias. This time, do remember to keep track of your books.
Sincerely,
Abby
Dear Irresponsible Comic Book Owner,
One does not simply “lose comic books”. I won’t make you fell bad, but you realize that you have committed a great offence. Sure you can shoplift or break a neighbor’s window, but losing your library books?! For shame! Luckily for you, here are some steps that can ease your tension and that you HAVE to take:
1. Check Your House Again: Comic books don’t just walk off on their own and elope. Make sure you look through every nook and cranny of your home. Everything! The kitchen, the bathroom, even your siblings’ underwear drawer (assuming you have some). Most importantly, and this is the corniest of them all, think back to when you last saw them.
2. Interrogate the Friend: If the first step fails, this one sure will be a doozy. To properly execute this method, kick open your friend’s bedroom door when they least expect you. Now stomp in, glare directly at their face, then come up with a cheesy entrance line (e.g. “Hey there sweetie”). If your friend refuses to cooperate, go to their comic book collection and start tearing up each book in half, bit by bit, until they squeal. IF that fails, grab their dearest object and threaten them by harming it. (Ain’t that right Mr. Teddy? Heh, heh, heh, heh).
3. THE FINAL STEP – snitch: This will work in to ways. If your friend has your comic book sand refuses to give them to you, make them feel cornered. Punch yourself in the face until your nose bleeds. Then, run to your friend’s mom with tears in your eyes, saying “(insert name here)hit me because he/she won’t give me back my books”. This will solve the problem hopefully. the other way it can work, if you couldn’t find your books, is to blame everything on your friend. Hopefully, they’ll pay the fine.
Well it’s been a long advice column. Hope you can use it if you want to avoid paying fines. Don’t worry though, I’m a professional ;)(tee-hee!)
Sincerly,
Abby
P.S I don’t have anything to say really. I just like writing p.s :p
Dear Loser of Comic Books,
. First, stand in front of a mirror and stick out your tongue. Now put it back in,you fool. Did you really think they would be in your mouth? Although, you have been quoting those books a lot…Can I just say, I may or may not be your friend with whom you were reading comic books? Also, I may or may not have taken a few of the comic books home. PLEASE DON’T HURT ME! Why are you worried about getting fined? How stingy could you be? It is only five million dollars. If you pay a fine, you will help the library out. So just pay the fine, okay? Don’t worry if you go broke. The streets are very nice this time of year.
Or, you could just call me and ask if I have the comics. I will then give them back to you.
If I were you, I would go with the first option. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity to live in the streets. Why would you settle for just returning your library books when you could go broke instead? If you call me, I am just telling you, you need to sort out your priorities.
From,
The best advice giver ever, just give me a peace prize already
P.S. Could you call in an hour? I’m not done reading the last one yet.
D3ar Los3-3r of Comic Books,
Sinc3 you probably can’t find all thos3 comic books, why don’t you join a cont3st. H3r3 is on3 that I found: It is call3d the “B3st Bad Advic3 Cont3st” and all you hav3 to do is giv3 advic3! W3ll… bad advic3. You, yours3lf, could probably giv3 the b3st advic3, sinc3 th3 p3rson who n33ds h3lp, you both kind of ar3 in th3 sam3 “situation.”
If you win, you g3t an iPad mini. You could th3n s3ll it to pay your “hug3 library fin3!” Good idea, huh?
I gotta go charg3 my phon3…
Br3ak A L3g!
Abby
Sent from my mobile.
Dear “What Should I do?”,
Yes, call your friend. There’s a high chance that you haven’t looked hard enough, so keep looking. Remember to wear a positive attitude. In the worst case, your books are absolutely lost because someone hid them from you or someone else has it. If all hope is lost, just pay for the books and if you find them later on, you can say that they are yours.
Dear Whoeveryouare, (I’ll call you John for sake)
First of all, you need to learn how to CALM DOWN!!(I learned it a few years ago). Second of all, WHY ARE YOU ASKING FOR HELP ON THE DAY IT’S DUE?!! You had 3 weeks to ask people but I don’t think today’s such a hot day to ask. Last but not least, HOW COULD YOU LOSE A BUNCH OF BOOKS ALL AT ONCE?!! (* calms down)
Okay, the solution is that you have to retrace your steps and look where you last saw them. You said you and your friend were reading in your backyard, check all corners there. Ask your friend (politely) about the comic books. Get a search party and look around in your house (tell them not to bug your paren’ts, but probably your little sister is fine). If all else fails then, go up to the librarian, tell him/her you lost those books, give up all your allowance and deal with it. Life is like that, and don’t be disappointing if your paren’ts spank you or ground you because you know that tried your best to find it and maybe some other positives things happened through your search, like making new friends, finding other valuable, lost items. Trust me John, it happened to me before and believe me, I had to go through a lot of trouble to find it, but in the end, it was worth it. So remember all these tips and good luck finding those books because, you’ll NEED it.
-Abby
*Mistake in second line. Don’t read that part.
Dear Comic Lover,
First logical advice: ask your friend.
‘Nuff said.
Abby
Dear Avid Comic Reader,
Check your room, locker, and backpack. Try asking your school librarian if they have any comic books from TPL. You may have accidentally returned them comics to your school library. (It happens.)
Still no luck? Call up your friend and ask if he has seen them, and if he’d be willing to help ravage through your house a second time to look for the books. If he’s a true friend, he’ll lend a hand!
I’m sure they’ll turn up somewhere! Sometimes, an extra pair of eyes is all you need.
Sincerely,
Abby
Dear comic book borrower,
Search in your backyard for any comics near furniture’s, comic books are always where lazy people leave their bodies.
If you still can’t find it, call your friend and demand for your comic books back.
Obviously he would say no. (these are your books here, it’s not his responsibility.) But continue to yell at him to give you back your comic books.
After your argument, be the first to hang up on him first, it demonstrates victory of the battle.
No time to lose! The day is nearly over. It’s better to sneak into his house this afternoon.
The library doesn’t close till later this evening, so you sneak behind his house to get into his bedroom.
His bedroom is probably his chamber of all sorts of comic books.
You sneak in, take your comics (and a couple of his) and leave the room immediately. When i mean immediately, i mean RUN FOR YOUR LIFE!
If he is currently in your room, or there is someway he found out, attack him like piranha and leave him tied inside his closet.
You leave his house, along with your the rest of your books, and head to the library.
After returning the books, you feel as though you were the hero in the comic you were reading.
You did the good deed of returning the books to its rightful owner, and you defeated the bad guy.
-Abby
I would tell you to just use the “Accio” charm. I would even do it for you. But I’m not allowed to use my magic outside of Hogwarts. You were reading library books outdoors, which is not allowed. Severus Snape saw you and confiscated your comics. Then he used the Memory Charm on you, so you’ve forgotten. Now, you must go to his office to get them back. Remember to overhear the conversation he is having so you can’tell me when he will steal the Philosopher’s Stone.
Definitely not Harry Potter
P.S. My scar is hurting. Have you seen a nose-less guy around lately?
Dear comic book borrowing person,
You are in some deep doodoo. First of all, call your friend and ask if he/she took any home by accident. I used to take friends’ stuff home by “accident” all the time. If they claim to have no idea what happened, go visit them anyway. Look around. I have a feeling your friend took it. The butler did it, you know what im saying?
Also there’s the small chance that you actually, you know, lost it. I hate it when that happens. In that case you have to do it the old fashioned way and look around. I suggest you start in your backyard.
If you really are the unlucky person you seem to be, head over to Amazon, get whatever you lost for surprisingly cheap (make sure it’s used, and check same day shipping). Say your little brother took the library sticker things off. Bam.
Good luck
Dear anonymous,
Come on, you never trusted your friends anyway, it’s without a doubt that they took the comics. I suggest putting your friend through intense interrogation including the good cop routine except the good cop never gets anywhere so you should tie them up in a burlap sack and beat them to a pulpy mess. If your friend does not confess to their crime of stealing the comics submit them to extreme torture such as water boarding laceration of limbs and so on. If after all of that they do not comply, steal their wallets to acquire enough cash to pay the library fee and leave them in isolation to slowly perish of thirst and starvation.
Problem Solved
Yours Truly
Dear Abby (Clayton Muller)
Dear Help!,
Well, it seems like you have yourself in quite a pickle! So, before you jump to conclusions and possibly ruina perfectly good friendship at the same time, I just have to ask you one question. Do you have any sibling? Young or old, it doesn’t matter.
If the answer is yes, are they out to get you in anyway? Perhaps in the past, you may have lost their library books which caused them to pay a considerable sum of money which may or may not have come from their hard earned allowance? Perhaps, you had an argument and he/she wanted revenge? It’s just a thought and I think maybe you should ask them first and if theys ay something like, “What? What are you talking about? Why would I ever do that?” and if they keep looking at anywhere but you, then you can guess that they probably do have it. The take the next seps, and go to your paren’ts and quickly get yourself to the library!
If no, well then there are three options. Either, like Dory from Finding Nemo, you suffer from extreme short memory loss. (Honestly, how can you misplace and I quote “a bunch of books”) Or maybe, you paren’ts may have already returned them for you, so ask them. Or finally, yes I’m sorry to say it but your so-called friend, has sticky fingers and a is a thief in training with a deep love of coming books. As I am a strong believer in justice and having it being served, you should then confront the culprit and never leave anything of any value or of no value whatsoever around this friend.
P.S. And one last thing Help!, do you have a dog or any kind of pet that enjoys the outdoors and digging? If so, It’s time to pick up a shovel and start digging Help! because I’d hate to be you when your paren’ts see the fine on your library card.
Is this contest still open? I don’t know if it is just me, but I cant seem to post my response to it?
*Please Note: The is a work of fiction. All references and incidents are products of the author’s vivid imagination. Any resemblance to actual events is purely coincidental.*
Dear Patron,
According to article 2, section 7 of The Library Act of 2013:
“Withholding a property of public library material consciously or involuntarily will result in a penalty under the cardholder’s name, in accordance to the age category of the material borrowed. Suspension will occur when the patron’s prescribed quantity of fines exceeds the standards set by the Librarian Society of Upper Canada. Such measures are used as a deterrent of late returns and enhance the circulation of public materials.”
Unfortunately liability will be held under your name, for the books were borrowed using your personal library card. Fortunately however, fines are debited to your account at the precise time interval of 12:59 p.m. on the due date of your materials.
With the time being 9:15 p.m. as I type this very response letter, you have precisely 2 hours and 44 minutes till your materials official become overdue in our system.
Thus considering that an average friend lives about 15 minutes away, (According to Friend Statistics of Canada) it shall take you a total of 1 hour for a two way trip to your friends house. It will be composed of: 5 minutes to obtain your paren’ts permission and explain that you lost you comics books, then an additional 5 minutes will be of your paren’ts lecture of your lack of responsibility, 15 minutes to bike to your friends house, 5 minutes to ask your friends about the whereabouts of your book, 10 minutes for him to freak out at the accusation that you believed he “stole” it, 5 minutes for you to calm him down and end on good terms and 15 minutes for you to peddle your way back home empty handed and comic bookless.
With 1 hour and 44 minutes remaining till your due date and the average local library being a 15 minute walk away, you have 1 hour and 14 minutes left to safely resume a full search in your house to find the comic books in question.
If however, you do no find it, unfortunately you will have to meet with one of our librarians at your local library and pay the value of the missing comic books as well as the late fine.
Fortunately, because of patrons like you, the library is now introducing The bookGPS a microchip GPS that can be glued in any of your library materials. Next time if you misplace a library item, just log online and use your unique GPS code to determine the precise location and latitude of the item in question. This iteam will become available in local libraries in the Fall of 2013 for $199.99
Or next time you could just be a little bit more careful with your things and actually pay attention to your paren’ts lecture on responsibility.
Hope everything goes well,
Librarian
*Please Note: The is a work of fiction. All references and incidents are products of the author’s vivid imagination. Any resemblance to actual events is purely coincidental.*
Dear Patron,
According to article 2, section 7 of The Library Act of 2013:
“Withholding a property of public library material consciously or involuntarily will result in a penalty under the cardholder’s name, in accordance to the age category of the material borrowed. Suspension will occur when the patron’s prescribed quantity of fines exceeds the standards set by the Librarian Society of Upper Canada. Such measures are used as a deterrent of late returns and enhance the circulation of public materials.”
Unfortunately liability will be held under your name. Fortunately however, fines are debited to your account at the precise time interval of 12:59 p.m. on the due date of your materials.
With the time being 9:15 p.m. as I type this very response letter, you have precisely 2 hours and 44 minutes till your materials officially become overdue.
Thus considering that an average friend lives about 15 minutes away, it shall take you a total of 1 hour for a two way trip to your friends house. It will be composed of: 5 minutes to obtain your paren’ts permission and explain that you lost you comics books, then 5 minutes will be composed of a lecture of your lack of responsibility, 15 minutes to bike to your friends house, 5 minutes to ask your friend about the whereabouts of the book, 10 minutes for him to freak out at the accusation that he “stole” it, 5 minutes for you to calm him down and 15 minutes for you to peddle your way back home empty handed and comic bookless.
With 1 hour and 44 minutes remaining till your due date and the average local library being a 15 minute walk away, you have 1 hour and 14 minutes left to resume a search in your house to find the comic books.
If however, you do not find it, you will have to meet with one of our librarians at your library and pay the value of the missing comic books as well as the late fine.
Fortunately,the library is now introducing The bookGPS a microchip GPS that can be glued in your library materials. So if you misplace a library item, just log online and use your unique GPS code to determine the precise location and latitude of the item in question. This item will become available in local libraries in the Fall of 2013.
Or next time you could just be a little bit more careful with your things and pay attention to your paren’ts lecture on responsibility.
Sincerely,
Librarian
Dear Book Lover,
If I were you with a bunch of comic books due in a few hours, I would do the following things.
First,I would look for the comic books in the places where I may have placed it. Of course, then if I still can’t find it, I will look everywhere.
Second, I would ask my friend if he accidentally took any, but before doing that, I will have to think about how asking this would make my friend feel. I think everyone has the right to feel suspicious about someone, so it is okay is you are suspecting your friend. Make sure you check everywhere before you asked your best friend.
I am not going to hope that this will help you, but if it doesn’t then just keep trying until you find those books. Remember that getting stressed over this will not help so just be calm and search.
Abby.
DEAR HELP!,
thanks for writing in. Here is what you should do.
1. Look , look and look again! They have to be somewhere.
2.ask your mom to help you look for the comic books. Mothers are fantastically good seekers (kind of like Harry Potter)
3. Ask your friend if he might of taken some home BY ACCIDENT. If you intend to keep the friendship make sure to NOT ACT SUSPICIOUS.
4. If he says no , but you are not convinced , watch some spy movies then ask to come over and try to( VERY SLYLY) look for them. *hint* persuade him to chug a bunch of water ( or any liquid)and while he is in the wash room, quickly have a look around
Hope this helped! 🙂
I wonder how the winners are announced.
Hey seeker!
We’ll announce the winner on this site a few days after the contest closes.
Hey –
Yup! The contest is still open. We’ll be accepting entries until the end of the day on Sunday July 14th.
Sorry you’re having technical difficulties. If you’re still having trouble submitting your advice, let us know.
Make sure to include your email address when you submit, if you want to be considered for the prize!
OKAY DON’T PANIC REMEMBER NOT TO PANIC YOU CANNOT PANIC BECAUSE IF YOU DO A TELETUBBIE WILL COME AND BREAK YOUR NOSE WITH A BRICK THAT WOULD NOT BE FUN SO DON’T DO IT KID DON’T PANIC NEXT WHAT YOU HAVE TO DO IS TO CALM DOWN AND ASSESS THE SITUATION LIKE ARE YOU SURE YOU DIDN’T SWALLOW THEM BY ACCIDENT BECAUSE THEN YOU’D BE IN A STINKY POSITION SO RIGHT NOW GO SIT ON THE TOILET AND FIND OUT FOR YOURSELF DEPENDING ON THE RESULTS YOU COULD A) JUST RETURN YOUR DISCOVERED BOOKS B) IF THE USUAL IS WHAT COMES OUT THEN YOU ARE SO SCREWED BECAUSE YOU JUST LOST A BUNCH OF LIBRARY BOOKS WHICH IS NOT GOOD OKAY SO NOW YOU KNOW THAT YOUR FRIEND TOOK THEM AND THE NEXT THING TO DO WOULD BE TO GO TO HIS HOUSE WITH AN AXE AND I THINK YOU SEE WHERE I’M GOING WITH THIS ANYWAY BREAK DOWN THEIR DOOR AND THREATEN TO KILL THEIR GOLDFISH IF THEY DON’T LET YOU DO WHATEVER YOU WANT YOU TIE THEM UP AND STUFF THEIR MOUTHS WITH SPONGES SOAKED IN TOILET WATER OKAY AND THEN YOU FIND YOUR FRIEND AND DEMAND TO KNOW WHERE THE BOOKS ARE AND HE’LL SQUEAL BECAUSE WELL WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU’RE HOLDING AN AXE FOR NOUN’S SAKE AND THEN YOU GRAB THE BOOKS AND TIE HIM/HER UP AND TICKLE THE FUDGE OUT OF HIM/HER NEXT COLLECT THE FUDGE AND LEAVE AND RETURN THE BOOKS LIKE A HERO AND DON’T EAT THE FUDGE THAT WOULD BE NASTY WOULDN’T IT YES IT WOULD BE OKAY SO APPLY IT TO THE BROKEN DOWN DOOR OF YOUR FRIEND’S HOUSE AND IT SHOULD REPAIR ITSELF THE REST CAN BE USED TO TREAT DIARRHEA YOU JUST NEED TO RUB IT INTO THE SCALP AND IT WILL SINK IN AND FLOW THROUGH YOUR BODY AND IT WILL CURE IT RIGHT AWAY AND IT CAN BE STORED IN A MASON JAR DECORATED WITH HAVE A BALLOON STRETCHED UNDER THE BOTTOM AND ALONG THE SIDES IT WILL LOOK PRETTY AND COOL AND ALSO PRETTY COOL SO THERE YOU GO IF YOU DO THIS YOU WILL GET YOUR BOOKS AND YOUR FRIEND WILL LOVE YOU BECAUSE YOU GOT SOME MAJIK FUDGE FOR HIM/HER BECAUSE THEY MOST LIKELY NEED IT AND NOW I’M DONE SO GOOD LUCK AND KBYE
~(OvO~)
And here is the lolcat version:
K DOAN PANIC REMEMBR NOT 2 PANIC U CANT PANIC CUZ IF U DO TELETUBBIE WILL COME AN BREAK UR NOSE WIF BRICK DAT WUD NOT BE FUN SO DOAN DO IT KID DOAN PANIC NEXT WUT U HAS 2 DO IZ 2 CALM DOWN AN ASSES TEH SITUASHUN LIEK R U SURE U DIDNT SWALLOW THEM BY ACCIDENT CUZ DEN UD BE IN STINKY POSISHUN SO RITE NAO GO SIT ON TEH TOILET AN FIND OUT 4 YOURSELF DEPENDIN ON TEH RESULTS U CUD A) JUS RETURN UR DISCOVERD BOOKZ B) IF TEH USUAL IZ WUT COMEZ OUT DEN U R SO SCREWD CUZ U JUS LOST BUNCH OV LIBRARY BOOKZ WHICH IZ NOT GUD K SO NAO U KNOE DAT UR FREND TOOK THEM AN TEH NEXT TING 2 DO WUD BE 2 GO 2 HIS HOUZ WIF AN AXE AN I FINKZ U C WER IM GOIN WIF DIS ANYWAY BREAK DOWN THEIR DOOR AN THREATEN 2 KILL THEIR GOLDFISH IF THEY DOAN LET U DO WHATEVR U WANTS U TIE THEM UP AN STUFF THEIR MOUTHS WIF SPONGEZ SOAKD IN TOILET WATR K AN DEN U FIND UR FREND AN DEMAND 2 KNOE WER TEH BOOKZ R AN HELL SQUEAL CUZ WELL WUT DO U FINKZ URE HOLDIN AN AXE 4 NOUNS SAEK AN DEN U GRAB TEH BOOKZ AN TIE HIM/HER UP AN TICKLE TEH FUDGE OUT OV HIM/HER NEXT COLLECT TEH FUDGE AN LEEF AN RETURN TEH BOOKZ LIEK HERO AN DOAN EAT TEH FUDGE DAT WUD BE NASTY WOULDNT IT YEZ IT WUD BE K SO APPLY IT 2 TEH BROKD DOWN DOOR OV UR FRENDZ HOUZ AN IT SHUD REPAIR ITSELF TEH REST CAN BE USD 2 TREAT DIARRHEA U JUS NED 2 RUB IT INTO TEH SCALP AN IT WILL SINK IN AN FLOW THRU UR BODY AN IT WILL CURE IT RITE AWAY AN IT CAN BE STORD IN MASON JAR DECORATD WIF HAS BALLOON STRETCHD UNDR TEH BOTTOM AN ALONG TEH SIDEZ IT WILL LOOK PRITEE AN KEWL AN ALSO PRITEE KEWL SO THAR U GO IF U DO DIS U WILL GIT UR BOOKZ AN UR FREND WILL LUV U CUZ U GOT SUM MAJIK FUDGE 4 HIM/HER CUZ THEY MOST LIKELY NED IT AN NAO IM DUN SO GUD LUCK AN KBYE
translated by http://speaklolcat.com/
Hey, person-that-was-careless-and-lost-a-precious-book, what I would tell you to do is pretty simple “break a leg” no seriously, break a leg, its pretty easy right? At least this way the librarian will have some sympathy for you!!! Another of my best advise that ALWAYS works on people of all ages and it better work on you because I have a reputation to maintain, is that if you can’t hurt yourself(Right now you should be feeling GUILTY)then take some acting courses because you will really need that face of yours to turn neutral when acting like you suffer from AMNESIA and its the long looonng term one (emphasize on the long)!!! Here’s a tip: Act completely clueless and when you are at the library act like you’re scared of the librarian and use your craziest behaviour!!! Keep saying “That monster(the librarian)will kill me!!! MOM help she will kill me she came in my dream and said she sees me wherever I go!!! STALKERRRRRR” and just like that faint leaving the librarian in a shock. Hold on it doesn’t end here, you must also take revenge on your friend ok here’s what you should do:
Find out when your so called FRIEND leaves her house, then go to your friend’s place, and ask if u can wait in his/her room, then mess it all up, and steal his/her clothes, put it in a garbage bin and throw it outside the window, then go downstairs and say you have to leave, make sure you leave your mark(like a devil’s face MUAHAAHAAHAAA… Good luck!!!
when does this contest close??? and when will the winners be announced
The contest closes Sunday at midnight! So you have to get an entry in before that if you want to qualify for the prize. (You can submit an entry after, but only for fun!)
We’ll announce the winner shortly after.
Dear Joe Average,
Relax. Take a deep breath. Everybody has been in a situation like this before. It’s all going to be ok. Well…you’ve actually gotten yourself into quite a dilemma, but if you listen to me you’ll be able to turn your pickle into a nice fruit smoothie or something. That was a pun. Pickle, as in a problem, versus pickle, as in the cucumber. Never mind.
Before you get out the blender – that was an extended metaphor for the pickle pun, by the way – you need to renew your books. After that, you have two options. One, you can do what everybody does and spend three weeks frantically trying to find them. I would recommend doing so for a few days, in case your luck begins to pick up. Chances are, however, you won’t be able to find all of them. Your second option is to spend the rest of your time following my elaborate plan.
Most people would simply avoid the public library forever to avoid the fine, but I’m assuming you would rather not spend the rest of your life as a fugitive. I know it’s a stereotype, but there are few things scarier than an angry librarian. Instead of avoiding the problem, you need to solve it. As you seem like one of those guilty types who is actually in possession of a conscience, I have kept my plan legal.
Here’s what you need to do. You must pretend you were mugged. Tear up some raggedy old clothes and roll in the mud before you go to your local library branch. There, tell the closest librarian that you were on your way to return your comics, but a gang of masked men cornered you. You valiantly fought them off, but only managed to save some of the comics. Don’t be afraid to exaggerate details and such. Cry a little, if need be. The librarian will be so impressed that he or she won’t care about a few missing books. You might even get a fancy award.
If you ever do find your missing comics, contact the library from a pay phone. In a deep, monotone whisper, inform the employees that they should come to the conveniently nearby abandoned mansion with as much money as they can scrape together if they ever want to see their beloved books again. If all goes well, which it will, because the plan was formulated by me, the library will be paying you instead of vice versa. Oops. I just realized the whole keeping-the-plan-legal-thing died. Oh well. Blame your friend, the government, and the cosmos. Just keep slurping that pickle smoothie and live to read another day.
Sincerely,
Your dear Aunt Abby Gertrude Jones
Dear “get the books back”,
Call your friend right away. Better yet,
if you can’track them down, please do – as it is better
for face to face conversation. You will say these exact words,
”
Go and renew your books right now.
Go back to your backyard and here is what
you will do. Take a hoe. You will drag this hoe
creating vertical lines, starting from the
front of your backyard, to the back. You will do repeat
the vertical lines from the left of your yard to the right.
Now, starting from your left, you will walk down
the path, spotting for any forgotten comics.
Everytime a strip of land has been searched on, place a
marker on it.
If you found some comics, good for you! If you haven’t, all
you can do to unearth them is to relax, take a few breathers,
and look harder. It’s not a life or death situation. The worst
thing that will happen to you is paying a huge fine.
If you’re still worried, go to a librarian and speak to them
about your lost comics situation. At least you will have someone
to talk to you about it and give you some advice.
All the best,
Abby
You will tell your friend, “Hi. You visited me and we read comic books in the backyard. I lost some. If you by any chance took them home, will you tell me?”
If you sense that they feel guilty, ask them to help you out with your search. If they are totally unreliable, are you sure they are good friends?
Dear Anonymous-Person-That-Hasn’t-Provided-Their-Name,
Your problem in particular doesn’t really surprise me. In fact, it is common that most people tend to forget that they have books for the library due at the last minute and struggle to get them all back as soon as possible. As well, to have more than one book out as once, if they become overdue, the overdue fine multiples for each book you have out. I’m assuming that at your age, you’re not going to want to have to pay for overdue fines. You’re going to want to save your money for a night at the movies, a new video game, a new book, something from a fast food restaurant, etc.
So, you’re probably wondering: what should I do? To start off, do something simple such as gather all of the comics that you have together so you know how many you have and how many you are missing. Maybe you will realize that you’ve had them all along but have never realized it. Search all over your house; in your room, kitchen, bathroom (I don’t know, maybe you read while you’re in there), basement, anywhere where you think that they could possibly be. It is important that you keep track of how many you have and how many you are looking for. If worse comes to worse, you should return all of the comics that you have to avoid paying extra for an overdue fee if there are comics that you have with you.
Secondly, kindly get a hold of your friend and simply ask them if they took any of the comics or not. Don’t question them aggressively because it may seem like you are accusing them of stealing the comics. If they have the comics, ask them if you can have them back and arrange a way that you will retrieve them and deliver them to the library before it closes. If your friend says that he does not have them, ask them politely to take another look to see if they have it and you do your part and check your house again just to make sure you have it.
Say you have found all of the comics that are due, take them back to the library as soon as possible. If you did not find all of them, you still need to be brave and go to the library with what you have to return. This is the worst part for some people. You approach the front desk with your books and you tell the librarian that you have misplaced some of the comics and that you can’t find them. If you know which ones are missing, tell the librarian so they can make a note of it. You might get some luck and go home and find them a couple of days. Return them as soon as possible. You want to reduce your overdue fee, you don’t? If you still can’t find them you will probably be given a week or two to look for your overdue items before the library considers them lost or stolen and you will have to pay for the new copies you must replace.
This experience definitely comes with a lifelong important message for anyone of any age. Always make sure you take care of the books you borrow from the library and put them somewhere in the home that you know you won’t “accidently” misplace. You can also record on a calendar when the books are due so you know in advance that they have to be returned before the due date. It is also probably the best idea that you don’t lend the books to others because if anything happens to them, you will be the one to face the consequences for what you have done.
I hope that this advice was very informative for you and that are able to find these comics as soon as possible.
Sincerely, Abby
Thanks for your awesome entries, all! This contest’s officially closed now, and we’ll be announcing the winner shortly. In the meantime, check out our other contests for your chance to share your creativity and maybe win a prize!
Also third line
Wow! Great entries. LOVE them all.
P.S. Can we get “The Best of Dear Abby” at TPL? It must be an incredible source of wit and wisdom. Love her space-age tele-porting necklace.
Abby’s necklace reminds me of the necklace in the movie, The Cat from Outer Space:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9SEaSW1jtnQ&NR=1&feature=endscreen
and
http://www.torontopubliclibrary.ca/detail.jsp?Entt=RDM1209023&R=1209023
Very good cat + sci-fi film. Corny and funny, too.
That is so true the necklaces are pretty similar!!!
When will the winner be announced?
We’re reviewing the entries this week, and should announce a winner soon!